Back on the Diet

Assalaamu Alaikum.

I have decided to give the diet another shot Inshallah. Last time I slowly slipped back to normal eating habits the more time I have been spending with the fiancé (he's been working with my dad for a few weeks in the mornings before his normal job starts).. The work is quite physical so I couldn't send him out with a light lunch, and instead of cooking separate meals for him, me and my family I just made him a good hearty meal and ate along. I did try to keep it healthy, but as soon as the PMS hit out came the ice cream and anything creamy and fatty.

So ye since today I declare my intentions to go through the Women's Weekly Wonder-diet Inshallah.

I have so much to do today.. I'm going to take the day off uni today since I am cramping and I'm only expecting it to get worse. I'll listen to the lecture online Inshallah when it comes up. But today I will have to do Legal Profession readings and prepare for the Tax Law, EU Law and Civil Procedure tutorials for tomorrow. And Inshallah I will do some job applications too..

Salam

Oh oh....

Assalaamu Alaykum

I have some bad news for you.. Actually it really good news in that it's a great thing to be happening, but bad news for me cos the timing is all wrong.

I just found out my grandma, the most beautiful person in my life, has booked her plane ticket to go to Bosnia in early May.. like I said - its great news for everyone involved, including my grandma and my family overseas.. they will be able to see each other after so many years and spend some time together.

The bad news is that unless we make a big dash and plan this thing within the month, my beloved grandma, my queen and my source of inspiration, won't be at my wedding. She's going for something like six months. It brings a tear to my eye just thinking about it. I can't have a wedding without my grandma. She means too much to me. But don't  be surprised if we just bring everyone down to Sydney and have our wedding there, at least the Nikkah. I have always dreamed of having my wedding in the Botanical Gardens in Auburn ever since I was a little girl playing there.

On the other hand I am really happy that she has the opportunity to go to Europe again. She has a son there, as well as brothers and sisters who she hasn't seen for years, not to mention other cousins and relatives. It would be really good for everyone over there. But I will miss her. I already do.. She's been in Sydney staying with my auntie for a month or so.. I really need to call her and have a talk with her.. I haven't heard her voice in weeks. Inshallah I will do that tomorrow..


But for now, its time for me to go to sleep. It's getting pretty late and I think those pain killers are finally starting to kick in...

Assalaamu Alaykum and Good Night.

Looking for the Ring

Assalamu Alaykum


I think its time to buy "the ring". We've been looking for quite a while.. I found a few that I liked, but by the time I get back home, call the fiancé,  and get back out to the shop again - it's either sold or the sale's over and its well and truly over the budget. And I'm really picky when it comes to jewellery so that doesn't make it any easier. I've had my eye on a couple of rings. We went to the shops yesterday to pick one out and at least put it on layby but unfortunately we found out that 3 of those are sold out. And even though I was given the option of ordering them in, the cost was blown up way out of what we are prepared to pay. So now there is only one. It's a little bit pricey but hey, you only get married once, Inshallah.

I think this is the one, but I would love to have it engraved on the inside

And I wish I could have this one to go along with it.. so sparkly... a girl can dream

So I think we will get that one. It is so beautiful. To be honest its the one I preferred all along but its also the most expensive. Inshallah we will be able to get it on the weekend.


That's all for now.. Salams 

SHOPPING TIME :)))

After four long weeks of hardcore study - I finally had a chance to give myself a well deserved break and go shopping. It started off with Australia Fair in Southport but that wasn't enough so we decided to go to the hijab shop in Brisbane, but not before doing a detour to Westfield Garden City. And since even that wasnt enough we stopped off at Harbour Town on the way back home.


We had a good time, just talked, looked around, had lunch and coffee etc etc. And I ended up buying quite a few things. Here's some of it:

Some of the things I bought...

There's more but I put it in the wash so ye.. can't take photos yet.

Overall, it was such a good break, even if I do feel really guilty for not doing any study for the day. Guess I'll just have to work more on the weekend.


Salam

Uni time

I'm back at uni again :)

I've been here since 10am and don't finish till 8pm.. I am soooooo exhausted. And we didn't even have tutorials today. Just 4 hours of lectures, a long long break, and another lecture from 6-8pm. My brain literally feels like its about to explode.

I did quite a bit today. I went to the lectures, both of them, did my Legal Profession readings, downloaded all my other readings, filled in all the jobs I could for now (from now on its law firm time till the rest of the government applications open), prayed a couple of times, read some Qur'an, and now I'm just writing this since this is all my brain can cope with, and chatting to my sister on skype.

University of Queensland

So ye... that's it for now. Salam

Job Applications

It's that dreaded time in the life of a student's carreer... time to put in applications for Graduate Positions. So that's what's keeping me busy in the little time I have left over in between attending classes, doing my readings, studying, sleeping and cleaning.

It is such a draining process.. Each application takes at least a couple of hours. They want to know everything, not just the typical education/employment history/extra-curricular activities... but also every detail of every subject taken (including ones you withdrew from before the end of the semester). That's the draining bit.. having to fill out seemingly never-ending forms and boxes..

But Inshallah it will be worth it in the end. I pray that I receive a good job at the end of this. 

But at least I am able to find some comfort and some welcome peace in reading the Qur'an Alhamdulillah.

I still have quite a few graduate positions to apply for. Inshallah I will cover what I wanted before applications close. For now I am focusing on Government departments, in Commonwealth, Queensland and New South Whales because they seem to close the first. Then Inshallah I will apply for the law firms. And if nothing works out, I can continue on with the Practical Legal Training Course next year or do some study at TAFE until its time to apply all over again. I would also like to do some work experience or volunteer work Inshallah (I know I should have done this earlier... what was I thinking??)

So ye.. that's why I've been slow to write - basically cos life at the moment is not that fun.. It's just so repetative. Uni, reading, eating, applying for jobs, sleeping... fun fun fun :/

Alhamdulillah :)

Well, it's almost time for me to go home and I still have a couple of things to do before the library closes (I'm still at uni at 8:30pm).

 

So Assalaamu Alaikum and Good Night

Busy Bee

I would like to start this post by saying my heart goes out to all the victims of the earthquake and tsunami in japan and New Zealand. Oh Allah help them with your mercy and give them strength and guidance.

The last couple of weeks have been quite busy. I'm back at uni and doing a full load of study again. So its been quite hectic. I am hoping to get into a good study routine early Inshallah. So there's been lots of classes and reading going on.

Last week was the first week I went to classes, since I was sick the week before. It went pretty well Alhamdulillah. I had Lectures on Wednesday and Thursday, and tutorials don't start till next week. It did feel a little humbling driving into brisbane. Its the first time I went there since the floods. And its kinda sad. Most if it looks like its back to normal. But there are a few reminders here and there of just how much the flood affected the area. Some shops are still closed down, and there are construction zones all over the place with exposed pipes and cracked concrete...

On Friday I didn't have any classes but I did go to a Legal Careers Expo at Southbank. It was pretty good, we listened to some talks by legal professionals from different fields. It was good to see what its actually like working at different law firms and other legal jobs, as well as the steps to be taken to get there. It makes me feel like I can actually do this. I can go out there and get the jobs I have always dreamed of. I just have to break it down into little steps and do them one by one.

After that I went into uni cos I wanted to use the prayer room. Istayed until Maghrib and met a few people in there. And guess what?? I found one!!! (well two - they were twins) A fellow hijabi doing law :) !!! I was so happy I wasn't the only one. She's in second year though.. but that's ok. She told me there's some classes on friday nights and invited me along.. So along I went.. They first had an Arabic class (yaaaay) and then a tasfeer class. I had a really good time and met lots of people. Its a shame that it's taken me until the last year of my studies to gather the strength to get involved. And I thank Allah for giving me the opportunity to go there, meet some sisters and gain some knowledge. Inshallah I will be able to attend regularly and finish the course and one day be able to understand the Qur'an. Its been something I have dreamed of for so long. I am 9 lessons behind, but the sisters gave me a website with the textbook and some recording of the lessons, so Insha Allah I will be able to catch up.

Ever since I have put on the hijab I've been quite lonely. It's been quite hard. I'm not one of those people who make friends easily, I always think I'm not good enough. And I can't do many of the things that I used to, and there are many things I don't want to do anymore. And unfortunately that means loss of contact with many of the friends I was close to. But Inshallah Allah will give me the confidence I need and bring good Muslim sisters into my life.

On the weekend Mohamed came over, and we just hang out with family mostly, but he did take me out for dinner and ice cream last night. And we did a lot of talking. Sometimes I forget what a great guy he is. He's so kind and smart and understanding, and he's so easy to talk to about everything. And he loves me :). I am so thankful to Allah for bringing him into my life. He's working so hard for us to get married. He's working two jobs and sometimes three. I'm not sure if I deserve it. But I love him more than he will ever know.

I pray to Allah to keep him in my life and to make it easy for us to get married soon. And I pray that he gives us a blessed marriage and salih children, to keep us close and living in harmony and with strong iman. And I ask Allah to bless our families and shower his mercy upon them. Amin

Why??

Why do I let her hurt me this way?
Why do I let her tear me apart?
Why do I let her walk all over me?
Why do I let her humiliate me?
Why do I let her bring me down?
Why do I let her bring me to tears?
Why do I forgive and forget?
Why would I give my life to her?
Why do I still love her?
Why do I still need her?
Why do I put up with her unforgiving nature, her constant abuse, her humiliation?
Why do I let myself be hurt by this?
Why will I sit here in pain while she's on the attack?
Why will I sit here and cry while her pride grows larger?
Why will I let her shatter me?
And why will I once again forgive her???????????


She's destroyed me so many times. I have lost so much because of her. I have lost myself. And just when things start to go ok for me and I gain back a little piece of myself she brings me down all over again.


But she's my sister! And I fear Allah!!


“Would you then, if you were given the authority, do mischief in the land, and sever your ties of kinship?

23. Such are they whom Allaah has cursed, so that He has made them deaf and blinded their sight”

[Muhammad 47:22] 

"Fear Allâh through Whom you demand (your mutual rights), and (do not cut the relations of) the wombs (kinship). Surely, Allâh is Ever an All-Watcher over you." (An-Nisâ 4:1)

"And (remember) when We took a covenant from the Children of Israel, (saying): Worship none but Allâh (Alone) and be dutiful and good to parents, and to kindred, and to orphans and the poor, and speak good to people (i.e. enjoin righteousness and forbid evil, and say the truth about Muhammad (peace be upon him)) and perform As-Salât (Iqâmat-as-Salât), and give Zakât." (Al-Baqarah 2:83)

And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “No one who severs the ties of kinship will enter Paradise.” Narrated by Muslim in his Saheeh.

.....

And THAT is why.

Because Allah knows. Because one day this will all be over and we will all be brought before our Lord. 

Ya Allah forgive me for any pain I have caused. Ya Allah forgive all my sins, known and unknown. Ya Allah please give me the patience and strength to get through this pain. Ya Allah I am hopeless without you!! I am so hopeless without you!! Oh Allah please help me. Amin. 

And oh Allah please help my sister and forgive her. Amin

So sick and tired

Salam,


This week was officially the first week of university for the year. I was supposed to go on Wednesday and Thursday, but I've been so sick lately. Its this stomach bug that's been going around. So I just stayed home with my mum, with plenty of fluids and bed-rest. 


I still feel horrible, but I'm doing a full load this semester so I really need to study, especially considering I missed all my lectures this week. Inshallah they would have recorded the lectures and posted them online. That would make life so much easier at the moment. 


Also, I have this presentation to do for my legal profession course and guess what?? they put me in the first tutorial. So ye I haven't even started and already I have a presentation to work on.. I hate presentations. If this course wasn't compulsory I would just drop it and replace it with one that doesn't have a presentation. But I guess I just have to suck it up and do it. At least it will be over and done with sooner rather than later.


Even as I'm writing this I feel so weak.
So I'm gonna go I think.


TC