Assalaamu Alaykum
I've been slacking off with my studies quite a bit in the last week or so. I just can't get started. I don't know what's up with me.
Maybe I need a change of scenery or something.
I've also been pretty tired too and can't concentrate too well. It might be that the reality of studying is kicking in. Although I thought that when I dropped EU Law it might be easier to stay on top of things, but I'm only now falling behind in all the other subjects.
I'm also feeling really upset about my grandma leaving. I dont want to be selfish, but its really hurting me thay she wont be there for my wedding. I cant imagine it without her. If only there was a way to get married while she is here. But we really can't. Mohamed's starting a new job and its their policy to withhold two weeks pay as a deposit, so even the savings we have now are going to be used up for rent and petrol etc etc. Lets hope this whole courier business works out. The pay is quite good but u do have to pay your own fuel and other expenses.
Its really frustrating.
I spoke to my mum yesterday and she was saying maybe we should perform the nikkah ceremony now and have the wedding later. I really wish we could cos that would get things moving and my grandma could be there. But now we dont even have money for bond, or to fly his family over from NZ, let alone anything else.
So I dunno. I should just forget about this wedding business and focus on studying. But then again, that isnt working out either.
Ya Allah, please help us on this path to getting married and bless us with a good, solid marriage full of emaan, love and happiness. Ya Allah, help me focus on my studies and grant me success in this life and in the hereafter. Ya Allah, remove from me the laziness and miserliness that I feel. Amin.
I think I'm gonna read some Qur'an before I attempt studying again Inshallah. I haven't been able to read for a week.
Salam
