Why do I let her tear me apart?
Why do I let her walk all over me?
Why do I let her humiliate me?
Why do I let her bring me down?
Why do I let her bring me to tears?
Why do I forgive and forget?
Why would I give my life to her?
Why do I still love her?
Why do I still need her?
Why do I put up with her unforgiving nature, her constant abuse, her humiliation?
Why do I let myself be hurt by this?
Why will I sit here in pain while she's on the attack?
Why will I sit here and cry while her pride grows larger?
Why will I let her shatter me?
And why will I once again forgive her???????????
She's destroyed me so many times. I have lost so much because of her. I have lost myself. And just when things start to go ok for me and I gain back a little piece of myself she brings me down all over again.
But she's my sister! And I fear Allah!!
“Would you then, if you were given the authority, do mischief in the land, and sever your ties of kinship?
23. Such are they whom Allaah has cursed, so that He has made them deaf and blinded their sight”
[Muhammad 47:22]
"Fear Allâh through Whom you demand (your mutual rights), and (do not cut the relations of) the wombs (kinship). Surely, Allâh is Ever an All-Watcher over you." (An-Nisâ 4:1)
"And (remember) when We took a covenant from the Children of Israel, (saying): Worship none but Allâh (Alone) and be dutiful and good to parents, and to kindred, and to orphans and the poor, and speak good to people (i.e. enjoin righteousness and forbid evil, and say the truth about Muhammad (peace be upon him)) and perform As-Salât (Iqâmat-as-Salât), and give Zakât." (Al-Baqarah 2:83)
And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “No one who severs the ties of kinship will enter Paradise.” Narrated by Muslim in his Saheeh.
.....
And THAT is why.
Because Allah knows. Because one day this will all be over and we will all be brought before our Lord.
Ya Allah forgive me for any pain I have caused. Ya Allah forgive all my sins, known and unknown. Ya Allah please give me the patience and strength to get through this pain. Ya Allah I am hopeless without you!! I am so hopeless without you!! Oh Allah please help me. Amin.
And oh Allah please help my sister and forgive her. Amin
